Stink in San Diego
THE San Diego city authorities are bringing out the sniffer dogs. The cabbies in that Californian city are some of them apparently a bit ripe under the armpits.
The regulations allow taxi inspectors to penalise cabbies who pong a bit and order them to bath and change before picking up another fare.
The drivers are up in arms over this intrusion on their personal hygiene arrangements, according to a news report, and if "up in arms" is taken literally, the pong could get even worse. Their union describes it as demeaning, reeking of prejudice and fuelling a stereotype.
But the San Diego airport authority, which conducts the tests, says: "Taxi drivers are often the first impression that travellers receive when arriving in San Diego and we want to encourage a positive experience."
How fragrant or otherwise are Durban's taxi drivers? People talk about them endlessly for the way they drive, but this seems a question that has not come up before. Should the metro cops take to flagging them down and sniffing their armpits?
Perhaps not. It could cause unrest.
Language
"INTOMBI yakithi uphatha ukhamba …" (The girl from our place is carrying a clay pot …) Well, that introductory line from one of the Zulu textbooks has stuck, so there has to be merit in this plan to introduce Zulu as a subject in more and more KZN schools. Back in those days it was a rarity.
Introduction to a language is an introduction to a culture and a value system. It can only be healthy. A word of warning though - it should never be forced. A language enforced becomes a language resented. The kids need to start learning Zulu gladly, from an early age.
And while they're about it, the education authorities need to introduce French as a subject. This is the language of Central and most of West Africa. Also, we need to be able to understand the car guards.
Fore!
A QUESTIONAIRE comes this way, leading to a profound philosophical point. It takes us back to America in 1923 and asks who was:
· President of the largest steel company?
· President of the largest gas company?
· President of the New York Stock Exchange?
· The greatest wheat speculator?
· The Great Bear of Wall Street?
These were considered some of the world's most successful men of their day. Now, 91 years later, what ultimately became of them?
· The president of the largest steel company, Charles Schwab, died a pauper.
· The president of the largest gas company, Edward Hopson, went insane.
· The president of the New York Stock Exchange, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home.
· The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad, penniless.
· The Great Bear of Wall Street, Cosabee Livermore, committed suicide.
But in that same year, 1923, the PGA Champion and the winner of the US Open was Gene Sarazen.
What became of him? He played golf until he was 92 and died in 1999 at the age of 95. He was financially secure at the time of his death.
Moral: Nuts to work – play golf!
| Test case THE traffic cops in Bloemfontein are getting tough. An apparently genuine ticket doing the rounds on the internet shows that businessman Chris Snyman was flagged down for the offence of: "Drove motor vehicle while driving." I hope he fights it in court. This is one to take all the way to the Supreme Court of Appeal and the Constitutional Court. Barry Roux should be available by then. Decaf OVERHEARD in the Street Shelter for the Over-Forties: "Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who wants only to cuddle." Tailpiece IT'S the craps table in the casino. An attractive, well-stacked blonde comes in and puts down a R20 000 bet on a single roll of the dice. "I hope you don't mind but I feel much luckier when I'm bottomless." With that she strips naked from the waist down and rolls the dice yelling: "Momma needs a new pair of pants!" The dice fall and she jumps in the air. "Yes! I win! I win!" She scoops up her winnings and leaves. First croupier: "What did she roll anyway?" Second croupier: "Don't know. I thought you were watching the dice."
Last word Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some smaller countries are neutral. |
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