International solidarity …
HOORAY, hooray for the first of May – outdoor lovin' starts today! Well yes, in the northern hemisphere that is. Here it's possible practically all the year round. But international solidarity, brothers! May Day, International Labour Day, Workers' Day – whatever you want to call it – we celebrate together!
The people's flag is stained with pink,
It's not as red as people think …
Er no, that's not the right version. How about something from the traditional maypole?
And from that bird a feather came,
Of that feather was a bed …
No, it all gets a bit suggestive. We've got to take this seriously. Toiling masses … hegemonic capitalist oligarchies … exploitation of the working classes … conscientisation … compradorist renegades …
Hey, surf's up! Let's go!
Scary stuff
PEOPLE living in the East End of London are alarmed to learn that the military plan to instal ground- to-air missile systems – some of them on the roofs of the buildings they live in – as part of the security arrangements for the Olympic Games.
It seems they are there as a precaution – to shoot down any rogue aircraft that might attempt a repeat of the 9/11 atrocity in New York.
No doubt every precaution has to be taken. But what an indictment, surely, of 21st century global society. The original Olympic Games in Ancient Greece were an occasion where animosities between the city-states were put aside. States that were actually at war would participate freely.
Will all this have any effect on spectator support? Perhaps not. But the poor old Cockney spadgers are given no choice. There must still be plenty with childhood memories of the Blitz.
Dress code
IT SEEMS unlikely that the ethos of Ancient Greece will ever return to the Olympics. Most people would probably prefer that the dress code of those days should not return either.
In ancient times, of course, the athletes competed absolutely starkers. While there might be some in the nudist community who would welcome a return to those days, practicalities such as the men's hurdles rule it out. The mind simply recoils from the thought of the women's shot-put.
Tidal flows
IT SEEMS the old airport site south of Durban – where they plan a dig-out port – belongs to the ocean anyway.
Reader Ron Coppin, of Hillcrest, says the marshy ground where they built the original Reunion airport was reclaimed partly by filling it in with sand from the Isipingo hills. He managed a business in the adjacent industrial zone – also on reclaimed land – and the underlying groundwater was so salty that the piping system the business required corroded within six years.
During the drought years of the 1980s, he had a borehole sunk. They struck water only three metres down but it was so salt it was unusable.
Yes, it sounds very much like the Kingsmead cricket pitch, which is affected by the tides. At high spring tide it becomes damp and soggy and the ball does all kinds of things. The dorsal fins of sharks are seen cruising the boundary, small mullet leap in the covers and fiddler crabs, with their giant pincers, are a constant threat to crouching slip fielders.
Crack shot
IN A HOSTELRY the other night this fellow told me how he shot a green mamba in Mpumalanga, using a .22 calibre rifle.
It was no big deal, he said. A mamba's reflexes are so fast that it struck at the bullet as it approached, automatically getting its head blown off.
Is this possible? I've no doubt the snake was shot but my suspicion is that this bloke's marksmanship is ahead of his zoology.
Any ballistics/herpetology experts out there who could shed light?
Royal surname
IT'S PUZZLING the way the young royals in Britain seem to have taken the surname "Wales". A Fleet Street columnist refers tongue-in-cheek to Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, as "Mrs Wales". But Prince William and his brother Harry do seem to use it as a surname in their military life.
Sure, their dad is Prince of Wales. But isn't the family name Windsor (once Saxe-Coburg and Gotha but changed by George V so as not to have the same surname as his cousin, the Kaiser)?
It's not important, but it's odd.
Tailpiece
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
Last word
No wonder people are so horrible when they start life as children. - Kingsley Amis
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