One to the good guys
EVERY so often the good guys chalk one up. In the Mpumalanga lowveld near Kruger Park, they were planning to cut down a centuries-old wild fig which stood in the way of a planned extension of the N4 highway.
But there was an outcry. Scientific tests showed that the tree – a ficus salicifonia – was between 215 and 265 years old.
The N4 concessionaires agreed to spend about R1 million rerouting the road slightly and were given permission to do so by the National Roads Authority – the same folk who are the villains in the Gauteng e-tolling dispute.
Credit where credit is due. The wild fig survives on an island between the two carriages – a delight to the human eye and a haven for all kinds of bird and small mammal life. It can be done.
Just so long as they don't convert the tree into some kind of e-tolling booth.
Crazy Test
FORGET the farmer's wife and the three blind mice, did ever you see such a thing in your life as Saturday's rugby Test against England?
First there was Willem Alberts's freakish try in which the ball seemed to cannon about as if in a pinball game – putting virtually everyone offside at various moments – before finally coming off an England player for Willem to fall on it.
Referee Michael Owens was completely bumfoozled. So was the touch judge. So were the players on both sides. It took quite a while for the TMO lads upstairs to piece together what had actually happened.
One of the sports scribes described the try as "fortuitous". That has to be understatement of the year. It was crazy, bizarre.
Then the decision by England's Chris Robshaw to opt for certain defeat by one point by going for the posts with three minutes to go, when he could have had the penalty put into the Boks' corner for an England throw-in and the chance at least of heaving over for the try that would have won the game for them.
What do they put in those water bottles they keep running onto the field with?
The punters left after the game, scratching their heads in great puzzlement. We'd won but it had been something very odd.
See how they run,
See how they run …
Bored babies
SCIENTISTS say they have conclusive proof that unborn babies yawn repeatedly in the womb. Experts have disagreed for a long time over this but high resolution ultrasound footage now confirms that unborn babies definitely yawn.
What they yawn about is still to be established. Maybe it's the mums' conversation at the ante-natal classes. Maybe they somehow pick up the T-20 cricket broadcasts. We wait for further information from the University of Durham, England, where the studies are being conducted.
Speedy Gonzalez?
SOUTH of the border … Mexican President Felipe Calderon has one last job to do in the dying days of his presidency - he wants to change his country's name. But he has until Saturday to do it.
Calderon has sent a bill to Congress to alter the constitution to tweak his nation's official name from Estados Unidos Mexicanos - United Mexican States - to plain old Mexico, as everyone calls it.
But he leaves office on Saturday. Not even Speedy Gonzales could manage it in time.
Manyana, hombre – manyana!
Phantom island
A SOUTH Pacific island either never existed or has disappeared. Sandy Island, in the Coral Sea, appears on Google Earth and on other world maps. But when a survey ship of the Royal Australian Navy went to take a look, the crew found themselves surveying a bit of ocean 1 400m deep.
Sandy Island is shown as lying midway between Australia and the French territory of New Caledonia.
Maybe somebody dredged it. This could be a new phase in international terrorism.
Tailpiece
THE BELLBOY has just set out an elaborate dinner for two in the hotel suite.
"Will there be anything else, sir?"
"Yes, I think a double scotch would be nice to begin with."
"Certainly, sir." He glances at a satin negligee on the bed. "And anything for your wife?"
"That's a good idea. Can you bring up a postcard?"
Last word
Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
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