Tariffs levied on them by the US last year have already cost the Spanish olive-growing industry $27million (R379m) and reduced demand has greatly reduced the harvest of black olives.
Cheese, wine, olives – what's to become of cocktail parties in America?
Yes, we know President Trump favours hamburgers, hot dogs, French fries and lotsa ketchup for his White House rave-ups, but there still is a diplomatic round driven by cheese and wine plus olives.
And tariffs are a two-edged sword. The EU have already responded with tariffs on bourbon whiskey (as have the Chinese), motorcycles and orange juice. And we're talking here about the Harley-Davidson (to shift the terrain from cocktail parties) the worldwide symbol of American can-do.
A preliminary list of other imports from the EU being considered by the US for tariffs includes:
§ Salmon fillets, fresh or chilled (Another cocktail party thing)
§ Lemons fresh or dried (To go with the ambassadorial G&T or to follow the tequila)
§ Virgin olive oil. (For the party salads)
Also (mystifyingly) "Wall clocks, not electrically operated, designed to operate over 47 hours without rewinding."
Cheese and wine parties to wind-up wall clocks. Is the developed world's traditional way of life under siege? Is Donald Trump determined to punish the effete intellectual classes with their subversively mocking cocktail party chatter?
Where does it end? Tariffs can indeed be a two-edged sword.
The wind-up wall clocks remain a mystery.
Canned skunk
DRUNK as a skunk? Animal control officers in Billerica, Massachusetts, in the US, found a skunk that had somehow got its head stuck in a discarded can of beer.
It was taken to a wildlife clinic, sedated and the can was removed. The skunk was then returned to the wild after a few days' recuperation from his ordeal, according to Huffington Post.
The animal officers posted a picture on Twitter of the trapped skunk, asking if this was a case of "skunked beer".
Skunked beer, it seems, has lost its flavour due to exposure to ultra-violet rays through green or clear glass bottles. Brown bottles keep out the rays altogether.
It seems the danger of skunked beer is negligible in these parts. Most brands are sold in brown bottles, a few in green and one in clear glass. But none of them last long enough to get skunked.
Zoology
WHOOPS! I don't know a Sunwolf from a Jaguare. On Monday I said the Sharks would be playing the Sunwolves on Saturday, while of course it's the Jaguares, the Argentinian Pumas lite.
Apologies. You need a degree in zoology to keep track of professional rugby these days, not to mention the confusion caused by Spiderman and Captain America.
Tailpiece
A CROWD is waiting for the bus. She's there in a tight skirt. As the bus draws up, she realises she'll never manage the step up. She reaches back and unzips the skirt a little. Ah, that's better.
Then a fellow grabs her from behind and lifts her onto the boarding platform.
"How dare you lay hands on me like that?" she hisses.
"Well, when you unzipped me I figured we wuz old friends."
Last word
To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.
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