That extra dop
WHAT a pulsating end to the round robin stage of the Currie Cup. Last Friday it was like a rerun of the glory days of Izak van Heerden as Charl McLeod went over under the posts after the ball had gone through what seemed like a dozen pairs of hands.
Then there was Western Province simply piling it on against hapless Free State, who have been one of the most attractive sides in the competition. Then the flawless seesaw match between the Bulls and the Lions.
Who says the Currie Cup competition has been watered down? It's still the best rugby in the world. It starts out with usually younger players playing truly adventurously, gelling into a formidable unit.
Then the Springboks return for the last few games, adding oomph. This isn't watering down – it's adding an extra dop.
Insults, insults
IN HIS latest grumpy newsletter, investment analyst Dr James Greener laments that the government has taken to insulting its citizens.
"This is a whole lot easier than actually operating an administration that delivers services. We have been told that although it looks as if things are falling apart at SAA, in fact things are not falling apart and actually the sudden departure of a dozen board members and top executives is a good thing for the airline as it makes space for people who really know how to run an airline.
"Again, we have been told that the cost and motivation for a nice new road in the heart of Zululand has absolutely nothing to do with us and we may inquire no further. And also the huge Zuma family compound that has blossomed at the end of that road is vital for the well-being and security of the president and therefore the country.
"Reportedly the Pres himself paid for much of it. Really? We have already discussed the relatively meagre presidential salary and it sure doesn't extend to helipads, clinics, underground bunkers and tunnels.
"We citizens are certainly being kept in the dark about how powerful our enemies are."
Complete these …
A TEACHER gave her primary school pupils the first part of a string of well-known English expressions, asking them to complete each sentence. The result was not quite what she expected.
· Don't change horses … until they stop running.
· Strike while the … bug is close.
· It's always darkest before … daylight saving time.
· Never underestimate the power of … termites.
· You can lead a horse to water but … how?
· Don't bite the hand that … looks dirty.
· No news is … impossible.
· A miss is as good as a … Mr
· You can't teach an old dog new … maths.
· If you lie down with dogs you'll … stink in the morning.
· Love all, trust … me.
· The pen is mightier than the … pigs.
· An idle mind is … the best way to relax.
· Where there's smokes there's … pollutuion.
· Happy is the bride who … gets all the presents.
· A penny saved is … not much.
· Two's company, three's … the Musketeers.
· Don't put off 'til tomorrow … what you put on to go to bed.
· Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and … you have to blow your nose.
· There are none so blind as … Stevie Wonder.
· Children should be seen and not … spanked or grounded.
· If at first you don't succeed … get new batteries.
· You get out of something only what you … see in the picture on the box.
· When the blind lead the blind … get out of the way.
· A bird in the hand … is going to poop on you.
· Better late than … pregnant.
Andrew and Andrew
LEADING artist Andrew Verster will discuss his work tonight at the weekly Mondays at Six soiree at the Alliance Francaise. The evening kicks off with the screening of a 20-minute interview of Verster by Gill Andrew.
Tailpiece
"Knock-knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Old Lady."
"Old Lady who?"
"Man, you yodel real good!"
Last word
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.
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