Happy days
are here
again
WHAT a corker of a match against Queensland Reds. What a Down Under tour by the Sharks, coming away with three out of four. How close we were to a bonus point try.
Our forwards annihilated the Reds. Our threequarters were superb, both in attack and defence.
Our guys have established themselves as a force in this tournament. Next Saturday the Jaguares, at home at King's Park.
Ole, ole, ole!
And the ODI cricket. Happy days are here again.
Wonky mural
A READER named Stan was at OR Tambo airport in Johannesburg recently. In the arrivals hall was a huge mural, about 3m X 2m, a colour shot of the Durban beachfront, Moses Mabhida stadium in the foreground.
But something about it was not quite right. Stan puzzled a bit then – bingo! The thing is back to front. It shows the Bluff and the harbour entrance way up in the north.
These Joburg landlubbers. They don't know their port from their starboard.
Horseplay
LAST week's piece about a miniature horse named Fred travelling first class on American Airlines reminds former councillor Laurie Kaplan of another yarn.
A white horse walks into a bar. The barman says jovially "Hey, it must be great to have a whisky named after you."
The horse looks puzzled. "You mean there's a whisky called Fred?"
Kept guessing
INVESTMENT analyst Dr James Greener wonders in his latest grumpy newsletter whether the government really intends slimming down the civil service.
"A few days before Minister Mboweni delivered his Budget speech, President Cyril, who obviously had been granted a sneak preview, used the word 'robust' a few times to describe what he saw.
"He wasn't kidding. Tito broke all the alleged agreements that have been made with the civil service about their salaries and security of tenure and bluntly told them that the country needs fewer of them on the payroll.
"So far, the reaction of the union high-ups has been sardonic disbelief that any threat like that either has the support of the Cabinet or would ever be carried out.
"I doubt that even the most cantankerous old bull in President Cyril's prized herd of very expensive buffalo has ever behaved the way the workers will protest when it sinks in that this is for real.
"Assuming that it is."
Charity gig
MY OLD muso mate Smelly Fellows and his reprobate band, Salty Dog, are putting on a gig later this month in aid of Project Bene, which raises funds for people who need prosthetic limbs.
Salty Dog will take folk on a ramble through the music of the Beatles and Smokie at Musketeers, 7 Barham Road, Westville, on March 28. The dining room and bar will be open.
The show starts at 6pm, and tickets are R100 per person
Salty Dog also plan raffles and appeal for donations of prizes – bottles of booze, make-up kits, gift vouchers – anything in a good cause.
Contact (for bookings or donations): Maureen – 073-0572414.
Tailpiece
VAN der Merwe goes foxhunting in England. He performs brilliantly, taking his mount over hedges, gates and ditches with great flair.
"Van, old chap, you're a natural," the Master of Hounds says to him at drinks afterwards. That was a wonderful display of horsemanship."
"Ag, thank you."
"Just one small thing though. In foxhunting we shout 'Tally-ho the fox!' Not 'Daargaatdieblerriejakkalsskiethom!'"
Last word
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment. - Josh Billings
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