Tuesday, March 24, 2020

The Idler, Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Drama in

the Scottish

Highlands

HOW do you frighten the wits out of a border collie so she runs away and hides where she can't be found?

You send a coastguard helicopter to rescue her owner and herself.

How do you coax her back again?

You set up an open-air braai of sausages and bacon.

But it takes two days.

Two ultra-marathon athletes had been reported missing the previous night on a run in the North-West Highlands of Scotland, in an area known a s the "Great Wilderness", according to the BBC. One had with him his dog, a Border collie named Nell.

They were found near Loch an Nid, in Fisherfield Forest, by members of the Dundonnell Mountain Rescue Team. The two runners were suffering mild hypothermia.

A coastguard helicopter was called to ferry them to safety, but this was too much for Nell. She took off terrified as the Inverness Coastguard chopper hovered overhead, and disappeared into the hills.

Next day two women members of the mountain rescue team, Alison Smith and Rachel Drummond, returned to the scene with their own dogs, to look for her.

These gals know their dogs. They set up a barbecue and soon had sausages and bacon sizzling. Next thing Nell appeared on the horizon. Starving, she didn't need much coaxing down to the braai.

They calmed her, put her on a leash and walked her to her owner's home, only about 8km away.

Nell loves sausages and bacon. She still doesn't like helicopters.

 

 

Underground music

 

THE music comes up out of the ground at Sudbury in Ontario, Canada. So much so that you can read about it in the Guinness Book of World Records.

The Shaft Bottom Boys of Sudbury – a four-man group - sang their way into the record books last week when they performed underground for 50 minutes in Creighton Mine, 1 893m below sea level, according to Huffington Post. They now have the Guinness World Record for "Deepest Concert."

The band dress in mining gear and describe themselves as celebrating Sudbury's deep mining history.

Does the neighbourhood complain? Nothing has been heard from the moles of Sudbury.

 

 

Solidarity

 

RADIO stations across Europe this week showed solidarity with the campaign against coronavirus by playing, all at the same time, You'll Never Walk Alone.

An admirable sentiment. But that song title? The campaign is based on social distance, self-isolation, quarantine … you're encouraged to walk alone, that's why the pubs and restaurants are shut.

 

 

 

 

 

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Super virus

 

A THOUGHT from reader Mike Butcher: "Every time I see 'Covid 19', I expect it to followed by 'Stormers 0'."

Yes, it's with difficulty that we adjust to the suspension of Super Rugby.

 

 

 

Tailpiece

 

AN ELDERLY couple have dinner at another couple's house. After eating, the wives leave the table and go into the kitchen. 

 

The two husbands are talking. One says: "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I'd recommend it highly." 

 

"What's the name of the restaurant?' 

 

The other thinks and thinks then: 'What's the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know, the one that's red and has thorns.'

 

"You mean a rose?"

 

"Yes, that's the one" He turns toward the kitchen and calls: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

 

 

Last word

Have you ever observed that we pay much more attention to a wise passage when it is quoted than when we read it in the original author? - Philip G Hamerton

 

 

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