Woman
draws gun
on waiters
IT'S the law of the gun, it seems, in restaurants in Memphis, Tennessee, in the US. A woman drew a gun on waiters in a McDonald's when she was given ketchup on her food instead of the jelly she had ordered.
But the cops pounced before any shots could be fired and the woman was arrested and charged with aggravated assault and unlawful possession of a weapon, according to Huffington Post.
Unlawful because she was only 20 and in Tennessee you have to be 21 before you are allowed to pack a gun, let alone wave it at waiters.
It's an inversion of what used to happen here in Durban. In days of yore there was a popular Italian restaurant in Gillespie Street, just back from the beachfront. It was run by a delightful old guy, skilled in the Italian dishes and absolutely charming in his manner.
But he could not stand ignorant criticism of the food. Customers doing so would be chased out of the restaurant by Luigi brandishing a revolver and warning them in voluble Italian never to come back again. I recall Luigi only once getting into trouble with the cops for it.
Those were different days. I'm sure that if anyone from Memphis Tennessee had so much as requested either ketchup or jelly, out would have come the revolver. Luigi ran a respectable place with standards.
Three issues
IN HIS latest grumpy newsletter, investment analyst Dr James Greener looks at SOE staffing, the Guptas and President Trump's abrupt departure from the Nato summit.
"For a moment it was thought that Eskom had scooped up the only fellow crazy enough to want to try and fix an ailing SOE. Now SAA has found one to head up their Business Rescue. Like the lawyer who has been retained by the EFF deputy head, one Mr Shivambu, these appointments are all from the much reviled and despised pale male category of citizens.
"If only we could export hypocrisy – but there's plenty out there already. Now is there another poor fool keen to fix SA Cricket please? And suddenly we are short of mayors who are jumping ship everywhere.
"Fourteen months ago, we cynics viewed the news that South Africa had signed an extradition treaty with the United Arab Emirates with suspicion. This is the country where the Indian family who effectively ran the South African government while shovelling cash into sacks, have gone to enjoy their spoils. "Unsurprisingly there's a glitch (translation error apparently) with the treaty which has not yet been ratified by UAE and so no one has been able to go to Dubai with a large net and leg irons to bring back any of the Guptas to answer a few questions and show where the rest of the money is buried in the gardens of the Saxonwold Shebeen.
"President Trump managed to ruin even a reception held by the Queen at her London home, Buckingham Palace, simply by turning up.
"Obviously, facts are scant but reportedly groups of world leaders behaved like schoolgirls and gathered in whispering groups throwing glances at the US leader and giggling. Very dignified and diplomatic sort of stuff.
"Trump got huffy and went home early."
Tailpiece
"DOCTOR, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a racehorse."
"Nonsense. Just take one of these pills every four furlongs."
Last word
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder. - Alfred Hitchcock
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