Winning
television
formula
NEWS of flood devastation, interspersed with comedy and and a bit of love interest – that's the formula for rivetting TV.
Greek viewers were told this week to stand by for an on-the-spot report from the seaside town of Kineta, where torrential rains had wrought devastation.
What they got, according to Huffington Post, was ANT1 journalist Lazos Manlikos being chased round and round in circles by a large, speckled sow, apparently with amorous intent.
The pig had zeroed in on him from the time he arrived at Kineta, grunting and squealing and administering none too gentle lovebites.
But Manikos is made of stern stuff. The news must out. He delivered his report on the run for Good Morning Greece, chased throughout by the pig, his colleagues in the studio helpless with laughter.
Yes, it's tough out there on the front line of news reporting.
Round and round
A WOMAN stepped out of her car in Port Lucie, Florida, in the US, to get her bearings in an unfamiliar neighbourhood, leaving the engine running.
Next thing her black labrador knocked the gearstick and put the vehicle into reverse, according to Sky News. Off it went slowly, describing a large, lazy circle. Then it did another, circle. Then another. And another. An hour later it was still doing circles.
The police arrived and tried to help. But the car doors were locked, they couldn't get inside. The labrador was looking bored. The novelty of his first car ride in command was beginning to wear off.
Jogging alongside, the cops managed to key in some code to open the doors. They stopped the car. The only damage of the episode was a mailbox and a rubbish bin knocked over,
It's understood the cops logged no demerit against the labrador's dog licence.
Major thrash
I KNOW a place … where we can boogie … That place is St Clement's restaurant, on the Berea, on Saturday next week, December 7, from 7pm.
My fragrant old musician pal Smelly Fellows tells me Durban fellow-musicians Tiffany Sheppard and Gary Gibb will be launching a book of poetry and song, on which they have collaborated. They will play and read selections from their work, accompanied by Richard Ellis on percussion and Alan Hobbes and Rorke Kemp on guitars and vocals.
Tiffany is vocalist for local blues band Bobby & The Dynamites and also plays solo. Gary was a member of The Yomax Family, The Handsome Devils, Bent Penny and various other bands and is now bass player for 50 Shades Of Grey - a bunch of mild reprobates who pop up and boogie at various venues.
Entrance: R100. More information/bookings – Emma: 031 202 2511.
This looks to be a right razzle. And if you're really lucky you'll get a sniff of Smelly's armpit.
Tailpiece
THREE little boys take Teacher a present. One hands her a box. She knows he\his dad has a candy store. She shakes the box and sniffs at it.
"Candy?"
"Yes Miss."
He next boy also gives her a box. She knows his dad is a florist. She smells the box.
"Flowers?"
"Yes Miss."
The third little boy gives her another box. She knows his dad has a bottlestore. The box is leaking a liquid. She puts a finger in the fluid and tastes it.
"Whisky?"
"No Miss, it's a puppy."
Last word
A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs. - Mark Twain
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