Thursday, July 18, 2019

The Idler, Thursday, July 18, 2019

Harmless

monster from

the deep

 

A HUGE jellyfish the length of a tall man has been spotted and filmed by divers off the coast of Cornwall, in England. The giant barrel jellyfish, which has a creamy orange colour as it undulates its way, is one of the largest ever seen off British shores, according to Sky News.

And there's something very familiar about its appearance.

It's not a monster from the deep, despite its looks, insists marine biologist Lizzie Daly, one of the divers. It's absolutely harmless to humans.

Not a monster from the deep. That's reassuring. But why does it look so familiar?

Bingo! It's coloration, its barrel plumpness and undulating motion bring to mind nothing so much as the portly, blond, tousle-headed Boris Johnson, probable future prime minister of the UK.

No monster from the deep? Harmless to humans? Sigh! Only time will tell.

 

 

Row erupts

THERE'S the dickens of a row in the US over President Donald Trump tweeting against four Democrat women members of the House of Representatives, who are from ethnic minorities.

He tweeted: "So interesting to see 'progressive' Democrat congresswomen, who originally came from countries whose governments are a complete and total catastrophe, the worst, most corrupt and inept anywhere in the world (if they even have a functioning government at all), now loudly and viciously telling the people of the United States, the greatest and most powerful nation on earth, how our government is to be run. Why don't they go back and help fix the totally broken and crime-infested places from which they came. Then come back and show us how it is done."

It's caused a furore, partly because three of the four were born in the US – one in the Bronx, New York, close to where Trump himself was born. The fourth came to the US at the age of 12.

It seems to connect with the dispute over the southern border with Mexico and Trump's insistence that a wall be built to keep out illegal immigrants.

And now the New Yorker reports that Trump himself has become a victim of ICE – Immigration and Customs Enforcement – in Palm Beach, Florida..

"Donald Trump was reportedly 'hopping mad' after a surprise ice raid left his Mar-a-Lago retreat with no employees.

"The ice agents conducting the pre-dawn raid swept through the opulent Palm Beach club and left guests with no one to prepare their food, wash their dishes, or clean their rooms.

"When informed of the news, a furious Trump reportedly barked at his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, and his sons Eric and Donald jr, ordering them to hurry to Palm Beach and wait on table.

"A spokesman for Mar-a-Lago called the situation 'dire,' warning that the resort had lost almost as many staff members as the White House."

This is satirist Andy Borowitz again. You gotta laff.

 

 

Tailpiece

 

THIS fellow and his wife were at her high school reunion. She kept staring at a drunken man who was sitting alone swigging his drink.

"Do you know him?"
"Yes, he's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."
"My goodness. Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
And that's when the fight started...

 

 

Last word

 

Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years. - Oscar Wilde

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