Astonishing ramp-jump
A CHILEAN daredevil has performed the staggering feat of ramp-jumping his motorcycle off a cliff in the Andes mountains, free-falling 3 000 feet then opening his parachute just 200 feet off the ground, to land safely.
Paratrooper Julio Munoz, 37, is matter-of-fact about it, saying simply: "The main motivation was that I found a group of friends who had the energy and the desire and the professionalism in their fields to develop this project. This was the result, a good jump with no problems."
Unlike a predecessor, Evel Knievel, an American stuntrider who used to ramp-jump buses lined up side by side – his record was 14 – and whose ambition was to ramp-jump the Grand Canyon in his Skycycle X-2, a steam-powered rocket.
Permission for this was never granted so he tried it at Snake River Canyon, Idaho, but crashed after his arrester parachute opened early.
Knievel crashed quite a lot. He's in the Guinness Book of World Records for sustaining 433 broken bones. He derived his showbiz name, Evel Knievel, from a night he spent in jail with a man known as Awful Knofel. (Originally it was "Evil Knievel" but then he changed it).
Munoz, by comparison, seems calm and collected. Nobody calls him Madcap Munoz.
Downstairs dive
EVEL Knievel captured the public imagination in his day. Down at Parliament in days of yore we had a much-loved messenger known as Evel Clevelly because at least once every session he would take a spectacular, death-defying dive down the stairs, carrying a tray of tea.
Mr Clevelly – a mild-mannered, perfect gentleman and veteran of World War I - was in his eighties.
Brideshead touches
CONTENTION rocks the university town of Oxford. British satirical magazine Private Eye has a feature titled Funny Old World containing bizarre news items, most of them from out of the way places. But this latest is taken from the Oxford Times and should interest all who follow developments in higher education. There are touches about it of Evelyn Waugh and Brideshead Revisited.
"We are absolutely furious with St Peter's College," Dr Haze of the Circus of Horrors told reporters in Oxford, "because they knew from the start that our shows are not for sissies, or for those of a nervous disposition. They initially said that they wanted a lavish show for their Summer Ball, so we offered them Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf, who can pull a vacuum cleaner with his genitals, but they deemed this act 'unsuitable'. Nor did they want Gary Stretch, who can pull the skin of his own neck up over his mouth.
"If the college didn't want Dan to pull a vacuum, we could have put him in an electric chair instead, pumped him with volts and lit fluorescent tubes off him. But they then told us that any acts that depend on physical conditions to achieve a shock impact were 'not suited to the occasion'. Yet Dan and Gary were born like this, and the college accepted a fork-tongued sword swallower and a female blade walker without complaint. Frankly, I think the students of Oxford University should revolt to get the acts they want at their ball."
After a spokesperson for the college had confirmed that the Circus of Horrors would now not be performing at their May 7 event, Captain Dan (real name Daniel Blackner) denounced the decision. "I have a brilliant resume, having featured as an ewok in Return of the Jedi, and as a flying teddy bear in several Muppet movies. To see me pull a vacuum cleaner with my penis is to witness beauty. This decision is an utter disgrace."
Ah yes, the dreaming spires ...
Keeping abreast
LAST week we discussed bra sizes in Britain, where they have apparently been getting bigger and bigger over the years.
The nomenclature of the different sizes and fittings is a little baffling but Richard Isemonger, of Hillcrest, comes to our assistance with SBH.
"It is a standard size I have known about, and a fair handful of British men have used it as a measure of appealing physique."
(SBH - Standard British Handful)
Tailpiece
She: "How do you like my new haircut?"
He: "Classic Italian."
She: "Sophia Loren?"
He: "No, spaghetti."
Last word
Howard Hughes was able to afford the luxury of madness, like a man who not only thinks he is Napoleon but hires an army to prove it.
GRAHAM LINSCOTT
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