A parliamentary official said cannabis seeds could be carried by the wind or in bird droppings.
Yeah, that's a good one to tell the beak. Hmmm. The work gang who fixed my roof some years ago surely couldn't have relocated to Japan?
A week or two after they left, a cluster of dagga plants . sprang up where they took tea breaks in the shade. My already highly-strung Irish terrier chewed on a couple of the leaves and then tore about the yard screaming and doing somersaults.
Bird droppings of course.
INVESTMENT analyst Dr James Greener covers some ground in his latest grumpy newsletter. He skips from the proposed national health service to a new Madiba T-shirt to the Football World Cup.
On Dr Aaron Motsoaledi's proposed national health service: "Is it boring to note that getting to that nirvana must begin from the current system of which he is already in charge and which doesn't do a very good job?
"Aside from the tired old mantra that 'the rich will pay for the poor' he needs to show us his workings on the numbers of qualified specialists, doctors, nurses and other industry workers that the dream entails, where they will be trained and what they will be paid.
"These figures will undoubtedly show that despite appearances, the rich are woefully incapable of funding such a grandiose dream. Far richer nations than ours are grappling with this sort of problem. It doesn't help that here our population growth far outstrips our economic one."
Then there's the odd story about the T-shirt we are expected to buy to celebrate Nelson Mandela's 100th birthday.
"This apparently simple fund-raising project looks like a rat's nest of broken pledges and hypocritical deal-making. The T-shirt which carries an unfamiliar portrait of a smiling Madiba also carries the words 'Embedded in the African DNA'.
"This meaningless scientific jargon helps to divert attention from the news that the cloth on which it is printed is cotton that was grown, spun, woven and dyed all in Mauritius, which is deemed to be African on those occasions when it is useful.
"Apparently this offshore production is OK, because the factory on that island is owned by the South African Clothing and Textile Workers Union. Workers there are reportedly paid by output and not by hours worked, a system not encouraged by that union in South Africa. It is uncertain if they are members of their employer's union."
On the Football World Cup: "The back to back immediacy of the tournament, which is now at the stage where favourites are being ejected, is almost exciting. Also, it's fascinating to witness how players are able to inflict life-threatening injury on each other with the lightest of touches. Fortunately, most of the victims do also have miraculous powers of recovery soon after they find out that no one, especially the referee, cares very much."
DURBAN poet Sarita Mathur has discovered a new religious sect.
Everywhere I go,
I see people
With heads bowed low,
Walking as if in prayer.
Or sitting in restaurants
Not eating
Or talking to friends
Or family at the table,
Just heads bowed low,
Looking at their cellphone.
Laughing at it,
Smiling at it.
Phubbing:
Snubbing the people
They are with:
In favour of those
not present with them.
Yes, it's actually a real word.
This I learnt,
Coined in 2018.
All over I see people
Heads bowed as if in prayer
Talking , tapping
On their cellphone .
The virtual world 🌎
Is taking over,
And we aren't even taking
cover,
We're slaves to technology.
Soon we will be lacking in humanity.
Everywhere I go I see people,
With heads bowed low,
As if in prayer,
Talking on their cellphone.
Tailpiece
PADDY and Mick are shocked to find three hand grenades in a field they are ploughing.
"We better take dem to de Garda," says Paddy. "Put dem in de boot of de car."
"What if one of dem blows up?"
"Den we tell dem we found just two."
Last word
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
No comments:
Post a Comment