Night on the town
ANOTHER anecdote from the little-known struggle off our coast during World War II. Reader Chris Taylor says his father was at a dinner in Durban during the war, attended by some of the military brass.
"The captain of a hospital ship captain recounted that his vessel had been stopped by a U-boat the previous week. The U-boat captain boarded and carried out an inspection. In conversation the German said he had spent a day and a night in Cape Town a week earlier.
"His crew dropped him on Muizenberg beach and he caught a train to Wynberg. In the evening he went to a film show – he showed the theatre ticket stub – and caught the late train back to Muizenberg where he was picked up from the beach by his crew.
"Talk about chutzpah!".
I'll say. And if he'd caught the train in the opposite direction he would soon have been in Simonstown, where he could have hoisted a couple of pints with the lads in the Lord Nelson.
Short drive
A WOMAN learner driver in South Korea managed to flip her car within seconds of getting mobile on a deserted road.
The woman pulled away cautiously then mounted a grass verge, the instructor shouting frantically: "Brake, brake, brake!" Then she rolled.
The episode was filmed from a dashboard camera and a video clip has gone viral on YouTube, clocking up more than 1.2 million hits in a few days.
Drat these dashboard cameras! They've no business serving stereotypes!
German food
A BEAR in Colorado Springs, in the United States, has developed a taste for German cooking and become a regular at a restaurant called the Edelweiss.
He's seen regularly on CCTV camera, tucking into rouladen - steak pounded and rolled, stuffed with bacon, mustard, onions and pickle, covered in a dark gravy and accompanied by red cabbage and fried potatoes – that has been dumped uneaten in a waste bin in the car park.
Let's have none of these jokes about German sausage – they're the wurst.
Future food?
THE WORLD'S first test-tube hamburger - made from laboratory-grown "cultured beef" - was cooked in London the other day by top chef Richard McGeown and tasted by food author Josh Schonwald and food scientist Hanni Rutzler.
The meat had been grown from cow stem cells by Professor Mark Post, of Maastricht University, in the Netherlands, in a three-month experiment that cost a mere £250 000 (R3 750 000). There was enough meat for one burger patty.
The verdict: It was "close to meat", according to Miss Rutzler, but she was expecting the texture to be softer and it wasn't very juicy.
Yes, but couldn't you say that about any conventional hamburger anywhere?
| Stole a road A RUSSIAN has been arrested for stealing a remote stretch of road. He used a bulldozer to lift up 82 slabs of reinforced concrete from the road in the Republic of Komi and load them onto three trucks. The stolen slabs are worth about 200 000 roubles (R60 000). Another man in Komi has been arrested for dismantling a river bridge. Did these fellows learn their trade in Durban? It's the kind of thing that's been happening here for years. New experience A SUPERMARKET has opened on the Berea, bringing us a new sensory shopping experience. Sound and aroma mingle to enhance the appeal of the goods on display. An automatic water mister keeps the produce fresh. Just before it switches on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and get the fresh smell of rain. When you pass the milk shelves you hear cows mooing and there's the scent of freshly mown hay. In the meat section, you hear the sound of a sizzling skillet and there's an aroma of charcoal-grilled steaks with onion. When you approach the egg shelves, you hear hens clucking and cackling, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The bread section has the tantalising smell of fresh baked bread and cookies and a banging of bakers' trays. But in the toilet paper section … er, they've been too clever by half. | |
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Tailpiece
Paddy: "We've won de lottery at last, Seamus. But what'll we do about de beggin' letters?"
Seamus: "I say we just keep sendin' 'em."
Last word
I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.
~ Zsa Zsa Gabor
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