Muddy times are here
MUD-WRESTLING was on the agenda at the St Clement's soiree of the arts this week – well, of a metaphorical sort anyway. MUD is the name of a musical trio comprised of Rick and Gill Andrew and Richard Ellis. There was also a bit of mud-slinging at the politicos who are ruining the country.
Much of the evening was a tribute to the late Syd Kitchen, Durban's maestro musician/poet for so many years, along with a clutch of MUD compositions. It just about brought the house down.
Then an eight-minute film made by the Bushman Movie Company (ie Rick and Gill) to a soundtrack of Syd Kitchen singing about Durban. This was highly evocative stuff, the camera work superb as character shots were captured of Umbilo, where Syd had his roots.
Then piece de resistance – a rap number by MUD titled Sick Of It! – an itemising of the greed, corruption and sheer incompetence that are wrecking the country in spite of all its promise.
St Clement's is in protest mode – pas op!
Midnight feast
AN AMERICAN man hid away in a Kentucky supermarket as the staff closed up for the day. Then he began feasting.
Trevor Runyon, aged 30, cooked and ate six steaks and washed them down with beer. Then he had shrimp and birthday cake plus 57 cans of whipped cream.
His clothes were a bit grubby so he changed into gear from the clothing racks in the store.
Then he felt a bit fatigued so he climbed into the ceiling and settled down for the night. He was snoring away when the staff roused him from his slumbers next day and called the police.
He has been charged with burglary and criminal mischief and is currently being held at Bullitt County Detention Centre, where the fare is said to be somewhat frugal.
Dangerous jelly
OVERHEARD in the Street Shelter for the Over-40s: "I made a lifesize jelly mould of Robert Mugabe but decided not to use it because I didn't want to set a dangerous president."
Mischief
A MAN WITH a bulldozer ran amok in the American town of Port Angeles, Washington state, damaging four homes – one being knocked completely off its foundations – and cutting the electricity supply to thousands of people when he knocked down a pole..
Barry Swegle "just went nuts" as he started the machine, used in the timber industry, and set about demolishing the houses, according to an eyewitness.
"He took a skidder and took out houses. I mean demolished. It was like a war zone."
Swegle was arrested and charged with "malicious mischief." The legal terminology seems apt.
Crowd hysteria
THE BBC HAS penetrated to the heart of secretive North Korea. A correspondent was allowed to watch a football match between Pyongyang, the capital, and army side Amrokgang.
The 50 000-seater Kim Il-sung Stadium was packed, though crowd noise never rose above a murmur, even when Pyongyang scored two goals and Amrokgang one. The spectators were all in dark suits with red ties or in army uniform.
Everyone had a metal lapel button depicting Kim, Eternal President and Great Leader. Portraits of Kim and the current Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un – the Young 'Un – gazed sternly down at the crowd. Some of the spectators were reading books – no doubt tracts on correct political behaviour.
Then at half-time not one but two brass bands struck up from opposite ends of the field, playing different tunes.
Then when the game was over everyone filed out silently.
North Korea is obviously poised for T20 cricket.
Eating insects
THE UN'S Food and Agricultural Organisation (FAO) says insects are a virtually untapped source of food for people, livestock and pets. About two billion people already supplement their diet with creepy-crawlies, according to FAO. .
Yes, we've heard about the Mopani worms. There are people who eat flying ants as a delicacy. But can you really see it catching on?
Spanish Fly? Now that's another matter entirely and quite outside the ambit of the FAO.
Tailpiece
MURPHY arrives home late from the pub, well oiled.
"Is dat you Murphy?" his wife calls from upstairs.
"Sure and it damned well better be!"
Last word
The problem with the designated driver programme, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.
No comments:
Post a Comment