Summit
of lingustic
hazard
PRESIDENT Donald Trump and North Korean strongman Kim Jong-un meet in Hanoi today for their second summit. Will it be another photo-opportunity or will they this time get down to brass tacks?
The Korean peninsula and its complexities are unfamiliar territory to many of us. It has some hideous verbal contractions. What, for instance, is the DPRK? How does it differ from the ROK?
The DPRK is the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, what most of us call North Korea. The ROK is the Republic of Korea – South Korea.
Sky News has put together a glossary of jargon we are likely to hear a bit of in coming days. They include:
· USFK - United States Forces Korea, 28 500 of them.
· The 38th Parallel - After World War II, Korea was freed from Japanese occupation and divided in two along the line of lattitude at 38 degrees north, with the Soviet Union occupying the North and the US the South.
· DMZ - The Demilitarised Zone is the border between North and South Korea, established by the Korean Armistice Agreement in 1953, and, ironically, heavily fortified.
· End of War Declaration – This is a potential concession in current negotiations. Though hostilities ended in 1953, the Korean War is theoretically still on.
· Peace Regime – This would be an agreement to formally end the state of war on the Korean peninsula and attempt to create a full political settlement.
· Panmunjom Declaration – This is the agreement signed by South Korean president Moon Jae-in and Kim Jong-un in April 2018 at Panmunjom, in the DMZ. They agreed to promote common prosperity and the reunification of Korea, to eliminate military tension and the risk of war, and to establish a permanent peace regime on the Korean peninsula.
· Byungjin Line - In 2013, Kim Jong-un announced the Byungin Line, a policy of parallel economic and military development.
There you have it. Get to know your DMZ from your USFK.
MEANWHILE, the summit is also a meeting of the world's two worst haircuts. A barber in Hanoi has taken up the theme, according to Huffington Post, offering customers free haircuts in the instantly recognisable coiffure of President Trump and the just as remarkable high-cut of Kim Jong-un.
"I feel happy with this haircut because people will think I look like the leader of North Korea," said 9-year-old To Gia Huy, who chose the Kim style.
"I like Donald Trump's haircut. It looks great and it fits my age," said 66-year-old Le Phuc Hai ."I'm not afraid of this bright orange hair colour because after this promotional campaign, the hair salon owner said he would return my hair to normal."
A couple of years ago, somebody used photo-editing software to give Kim's hair to Trump and vice-versa. The results were unnerving:
DOG-WALKERS in Arlington, Texas, were surprised to encounter in the park a fellow wearing only a gold speedo and smeared from head to toe with peanut butter.
The dogs took to him right away, licking him all over.
The fellow explained that he was a college student and he'd lost a bet. This was his penalty for losing – 10 minutes in the park, thus garbed and smeared.
Tailpiece
"WHAT do you think our husbands talk about down at the pub?"
"Probably the same as we talk about."
"What? The dirty-minded blighters!"
Last word
The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale.
Arthur C Clarke
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